People Want Me Around

This submission is from Ask an Aspergirl. It was originally published to her own blog and is reprinted here with permission.

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POINT: People want me around.

COUNTERPOINT: Everyone is always so nice to me — they must feel sorry for me since I tend to worry aloud about things around them. I don’t know when people want me to stop talking or change the subject to something they would rather discuss instead. That must get tiresome after a while.  My pop culture references annoy people. People glaze over after I begin a monologue; I’ve only recently noticed that, though I have wondered if people find me odd.  Maybe I’m annoying. I feel so uncomfortable around other people sometimes, as if they want me to leave, especially when I have nothing in common with anyone in the room. I don’t fit anywhere.

ACTUAL POINT: My close friends have told me, verbatim, “We like having you around.” I’m kind and insightful. I listen and talk through people’s worries with them because I know what it’s like to feel ridiculously anxious about things. People are nice to me because they like me — not because they pity me. I’ve met people who are mutually nerdy about television programs and films — we’ve had long, productive conversations. There are places where I feel deeply uncomfortable, but that doesn’t mean there is anything inherently wrong with me. Sometimes I miss social cues, but that doesn’t  mean I alienate people. My friends understand that I’m trying the best I can to participate in conversations. I’ve found communities where I fit.

CONCLUSION: People want me around, and that’s okay.

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